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Sunday, October 28, 2007

[vinnomot] Humanism and Spirituality: (Basic 3):: Rituals in the death of a Human Being

 
Developing Human Potential Without Religion
 
Part 3: Ritual om the death of a Human Being
 
From antiquity perhaps the most important life-cycle rite has been associated with the death of a person, and all kinds of rituals and ceremonies have been carried out in order to mark the end of the life of an individual. Such rituals/ceremonies tend to reflect the cultural customs of the society of the deceased, and till recent have been most often of the nature whic people have been calling religious, even when they are mostly cultural expressions.
There are two important personal reasons why the demise of a person is accompanied with ritzal or ceremony. First, to allow life to pass away without remark or tribute of some kind has never seemed right to the human psyche, whatever the nature of the deceased person. Second, death often generates a feeling of the fragility and vulnerability of life. It is a time that can bring loneliness. It is a time for reflection on life and its meaning, our role in life, and the way forward after loss. It is also a time when the deepest psychological fears about death emerge. Given these factors, death is a gathering together of the living to comfort, support and to share grief. In perhaps no other life-cycle rite are so many dimensions of the deeper human personality called upon.
Humanists also believe that it is important to mark the occasion of someone's death with ritual and ceremony. But since humanists have no belief in the fictional life beyond death, and since they place such emphasis on the quality of individual life, a humanist funeral ceremony is a celebration of a life lived. It concentrates wholly on the deceased individual with warmth, depth of understanding, meaning, positivity, and dignity. Unlike a marriage, there are few legal requirements for a funeral ceremony, other than for the disposal of the body, and more and more people are planning the funerals of their deceased family member themselves -- and sometimes even their own future funerals -- at a personal level. Many people today do not have any absurd religious belief, so a religious service that speaks of the horrific fictional resurrection of the dead and a life everlasting has little meaning.
Death and afterlife are important concepts in theistic religion, and they will therefore be the main focus around which a religious service is conducted. A humanist funeral is quite the opposite for it will focus positively, though sensitively, on life, honouring the unique personality of the deceased, offering comfort for the lives of those who are left behind, and reflecting on the precious nature of life in general. It severs relationships between the living and the dead gracefully, sensitively, and with dignity, but always positively.
A humanist funeral, then, is not a service offered to a deity-whether Allah or God- but a celebration of a life that has been lived and has come to an end. This is why, like Theravada Buddhists, humanists can speak of a funeral rituals and celebration. And the celebration of the life of the deceased will take the form of a personal look at the life that was lived. This will include referring to the deceased by his or her nickname, and accounts of his or her childhood, education, work, family, special interests, and special friends. It is the little things that are often particularly touching about the life of the deceased at such a humanist ceremony -- the cup of tea with the friebds, the walks with the friends , the favourite sweater, the favourite armchair, and the funny anecdotes.
Countries like the United Kingdom have a long, long history of the cuktural/religious burial from pre-history and antiquity to recent times. Until the Medieval Age-year 1880 all funerals were cultural/religious services, and all deceased people were buried until the mid 1880s. As the move towards secular and humanist burial services occurred, Anglican Christian clergymen became so outraged that they used to turn up at the unlawful burial to read the Anglican service. Since the Anglican Christian service related solely to burial, cremation was not possible until after 1880. But in 1884 an agnostic surgeon, Sir Henry Thompson, founded a Cremation Society and cremation became possible. Yet it was not until the 1960s that cremation became more widely evident than burial.
Personal rituals and Ceremonies
Writing the words to include ifor a loved one's funeral can be a comforting way to communicate humanist aspirations for life and reflections on the nature of death, as illustrated by the following excerpts from original student work:
A Sample of Speech:
Being masters of our destiny, we humans know that there is no ultimate reward or punishment awaiting us. So we strive to reach our full potential during our short time on this very earth. It is our responsibility to do our very best, to face life and its limitations, and to rise above those limitations with dignity, happy in the knowledge that we are creating a good life for ourselves, for others, and for future generations.
[Name of deceased]
He/sge believed in the philosophy of active participation in life. Always cheerful and full of optimism, all his energies went into creating a world that shared mutual respect and freedom of opinion, a world where each individual was allowed to fulfil his or her own potential. He ultimately believed in this very world ay a world for craeting and living with  happiness, justice and peace.
(Susan Williams)
A Sample:
I have died
My life no longer exists
Every one of yours does.
So all please
Go away from this
With the intention
To celebrate the life I had:
The good times,
The bad times.

Go drink
Good friends
Go, play music;
Not solemn, but loudly
Not quiet, but lively
Cause no noise pollution!
Disturb not neighbours!
If they ask "Why?"

Say "I'm alive!"
Don't dwell
Over life without me
Go, live life
If not for yourself
at least for me…. !
(Samantha Day)
Today most U.K. humanists -- indeed, most non-religious and even some cuktural religious people -- are cremated rather than buried, but humanist burials are also possible. In the latter case, a humanist may wish to be buried in any cemetery -- perhaps to be buried with a spouse, or to be in the familiar local cemetery -- and this may involve a prior ceremony. Then, too, some people may wish to be buried in the countryside, with a humanist ceremony.
Despite being public and not religious buildings, crematoria are often modelled on the style of similar buildings of the past. Religious people may demand cultural/religious service and the sign of death-the cross, but this could be removed; it is not a difficulty providing there is time to replace them before the next cremation ceremony. What is important is that in saying farewell to someone who has died, aynd there is every opportunity to do so in the best possible way. When those close to the deceased are able to plan a ceremony suited to the life that has come to an end, then it is an aptly intimate and sensitive farewell.
So there is no reason why members of a family and/or friends cannot conduct funeral ceremony personaly for a departed loved one. But since the occasion is a sorrowful one, it is often easier to have someone more removed from the grief to help plan and conduct the ceremony. Humanist officiants fulfil this purpose. They are well trained and understanding, and will not only help to plan a ceremony uniquely suitable to the individual, but will usually take charge of any part, or all, of the ceremony if requested to.
A humanist funeral is usually divided into five parts. First, there are words of welcome to those who have come, and perhaps a brief explanation about the nature of a humanist funeral. Some reflective words about life and death follow, and then the main focus of the ceremony -- the tribute to the life of the deceased. The committal of the body follows, and then the closing words of the ceremony to conclude. Personal tributes in the form of poetry, prose or music can be accommodated. Though these may be placed at any point during the ceremony, they are usually more particularly relevant to the part of the ceremony devoted to reflections on life and death, but at the same time, would have some meaning for the life of the deceased.
 

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