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Saturday, August 1, 2015

Re: [mukto-mona] Re: Wife-Beating :"why and how someone should beat his wife?

To bring the Muslims to a modern civilized state, the discussion needs to move on from whether or not Mohammad beat his wives or whether he prescribed as to when and how a man should beat his wife. The discussion should be whether it is right or wrong for a man to beat his wife; never mind what wisdom or lack of it Mohammad had.



On Saturday, August 1, 2015 10:37 AM, "Dristy Pat [mukto-mona]" <> wrote:

What I don't understand is - why does a religion even prescribe how to beat wife? Isn't it demeaning to women? Apart from that -  if Prophet did not do so, why would he even suggest others how to do it? None of these make sense. 

On Fri, Jul 31, 2015 at 10:29 PM, Nehal Adil [mukto-mona] <> wrote:
Your suggestive innuendo is quite disparaging: 
Your question was "why and how someone should beat his wife? "
Please note that you mentioned "should beat" !!!!!

You are in the best position to answer your own question ... [Please do that]

Bear in mind, as you have said, (and I too emphasize) "Prophet (PBUH) never hit 
his wife."...

I personally think that abuse (physical or mental) of  the wife by a husband is 
totally unacceptable.

Although Surah Nisah has some allowance for ""মৃদু প্রহার" of "disobedient wife",
it (i,e beating wife)is not obligatory either.....

However, some muslim men use the text as an excuse for domestic violence.
In Bangladesh, a land of 90% muslims wife-beating for trifling matters are 

What do you think ?
Always remember 
(There is no compulsion in religion. Verily, the right path has 
become distinct from the wrong path ................).

On Fri, Jul 31, 2015 at 9:47 PM, Syed Haque <> wrote:
The example you provided is not what I asked for. May be you did not understand my question.
Here is what I want you to tell me. Suppose a man came to you and said I just beat my wife up the way it is mentioned in the Quran because she didn't listen to me. He poses a question to you: "Tell me  now is this  beating done in accordance with Quran."
What would be your response?


Date: Fri, 31 Jul 2015 04:11:04 -0400
Subject: Wife-Beating in Bangladesh - Example !

"Can you give me a small example why and how someone should beat his wife? " - Syed Haque 

Have a reality check:


  • But due to the dominance of Islamic instruction, these courts do not administer true justice.
Salma Akhtar 22, a housewife of district Naogaon in Bangladesh was brutally beaten by her husband on February 24. She was accused of wishing to get more institutional education. After the beating, her husband, Shohag Ali, burned her with kerosene, seriously scorching her over 90% of her skin. She is currently under treatment at the Rajshahi Hospital..
In the last two months alone, 76 cases of assaults by husbands have been published in different local dailies in Bangladesh. This practice does not happen by fits and starts; is in full swing throughout the country -- not only to wives from rural areas; sometimes even educated wives who are university graduates suffer beatings.
According to the "Bangladesh Demographic And Health Survey-2007" by the National Institute of Population Research and Training under Ministry of Health and Family Welfare, 60 percent of the women in Bangladesh are victims of spousal violence in the country.
The research table reports that the most widely accepted reasons for wife beating are: disobeying elders 24%; arguing with the husband 22%; going out without permission or having informed one's husband 18%, and neglecting the children 16%. Only 9% percent of women feel that denying sexual intercourse is a reason for a man to beat his wife.
On attitudes toward wife beating, the survey says, 36% of Bangladeshi man age 15-49 agree that at least one of the reasons given is sufficient justification for wife beating.
Although it is not mentioned in the survey, the progressive intellectuals in the country believe that part of this attitude is derived from and inspired by some Quranic verses. A verse (4:34), Surah An-Nisa [the women] of Qur'an says, "Men are the protectors and maintainers of women, because Allah has made one of them to excel the other, and because they spend from their means. Therefore the righteous women are devoutly obedient to Allah and to their husbands, and guard in the husband's absence what Allah ordered them to guard. As to those women on whose part you see ill conduct, admonish them first, next, refuse to share their beds, and finally, beat them, but if they return to obedience, seek not against them means. Surely Allah is ever most high, most great."
Most of the people in the country strongly believe that the Qur'an is the source and code of life. All the interpretation commonly claim that man are superior to women on account of the qualities with which Allah has gifted the one above the other, because they spend their wealth to maintain them. Good women are obedient. As for those from whom you fear disobedience, admonish them and send them to beds apart and beat them.
The formal law on the repression of women is tight in Bangladesh. There have been some amendments; apparently now it is satisfactory to the Women Lawyers Association of Bangladesh. But the laws are not effective. With the direct and indirect help of the U.N., the Bangladesh government has established hundreds of village courts which work on family matters with the help of local representatives. But due to the dominance of Islamic instruction, these courts do not administer true justice. The Imams of the more than 250,000 Mosques in the country are ordering the locals, especially men who are arguing with their wives, to follow the orders given by Allah.
Also read:

Most Bangladeshi men think beating their wife is OK - Gulf ...
Gulf News
Mar 9, 2014 - Dhaka: Despite the appreciation earned byBangladesh for the empowerment of women in recent decades, most men in the country still believe ...

Most Bangladeshi Think Wife Beating is Legitimate: Study ...
The New Indian Express
Mar 8, 2014 - Despite Bangladesh's appreciation for women empowerment in the recent decades, most people in the country believe wife beating is ...

94% of Bengali Husband's Beat Their Wives! - ... › Discussion Forum › Open Board
Jan 1, 2003 - 4 posts - ‎2 authors
94% of Bengali Husbands Beat Their Wives News fromBangladesh Rise of literacy rate and mobility in society has not not restrained the ...
National Center for Biotechnology Information
by SR Schuler - ‎2012 - ‎Cited by 7 - ‎Related articles
Elsewhere, as many as 90% of women said wife-beating was justified for some reason (Yount & Li, 2009). In the Bangladesh2004 DHS, 55% of men ages 15 ...

2015-07-30 18:35 GMT-04:00 Syed Haque <>:
(তাফসীরে কুরতুবী) Are you sure this is an authentic interpretation? Lot of contemporary scholars do not agree with this interpretation of "hitting with a মেসওয়াক".
Like I said before people sometimes use sources which haven't gone through scrutiny meaning they are not authentic.  
Allah SWT is compassionate and forgiving and Prophet (PBUH) never hit his wife.
Can you give me a small example why and how someone should beat his wife? 


Posted by: Sukhamaya Bain <>

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"I disapprove of what you say, but I will defend to the death your right to say it".
               -Beatrice Hall [pseudonym: S.G. Tallentyre], 190