I DO NOT KNOW THIS BANGLADESHI CULTURE
The music was blaring so loudly that I could not talk to the next person. The couples were swinging violently to the tune. I was way back of the room and the words I heard of the MC were not very clear. I could not figure out if she was speaking in Bangla, Hindi or English. Same was with case with the songs being played.
Earlier, arranging for the evening prayer was a challenge. We were given a spot by the side of the corner room where food was later served. The Adhan was called. A very small number responded.
A friend of mine sitting in my table simply made a comment: "It looks like we need to learn Urdu or Hindi to understand what is going on".
Other persons sitting in my table were two young men, one from Egypt and the other from Iran. Both second generation immigrants and fully Americanized. Both left the party long before food was served. I had lengthy and interesting conversation with them. One of them asked me if the ceremony was a typical Bangladeshi wedding.
Yes, I was attending the wedding ceremony of a Bangladeshi couple both born in Bangladesh who came to the US very recently.
I could not relate to any thing Bangladeshi or Islamic in any thing that I saw last night. Later when I explained my feelings and experience I was told that Bangladeshi weddings are like that now a days.
Marriage is one of the most important institution in our society and as such this is regarded as a time to acquire blessing and good wishes from the family members and friends. All I saw last night was indecent jokes, rough talks, loud music and vulgar dances.
Is this the way we want our children to start the new phase of their lives?
I have attended many weddings in this country where the guests were from diverse ethnic backgrounds, though mostly from the Indian sub-continent. I am used to weddings starting with the recitation from the Quran with translation, proper arrangements for prayer, sober introduction of family members, good food, sophisticated music some times Bangla, Urdu or Hindi classics. Besides Muslims, guests also include local American Christian and Hindus (both from India and Bangladesh).
Yet last night the huge hall was mostly full of Banladeshi Muslims (with the exception of the two guests I just mentioned).
I would request members of this forum who are dedicated member of all the scores of Bangladeshi associations to realize that in our zeal to hold on to Bangladeshi nationalism and our disregard for Islam we are losing our children to a cheap form of culture which is most unhealthy and far removed from the decent simple Bangladeshi culture we should be proud of.
I fully understand that many people in our society are not very serious about Islam but to the best of my knowledge most people are very proud of our language. I left the wedding hall with this thought in my mind: why are our children turning to this cheap, vulgar, loud popular Bollywood (I was told that this is what it is called) culture. Where is the Bangla culture? I do not know this Bangladeshi culture.
Aziz Ul Huq
July 24, 2008
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